Your responsibility as a singer.

I had a client share the other day that it doesn't feel safe to make loud noises where she lives.

When she practices, it feels scary to really let go and go big.

She was working through a new song with some challenging belted higher notes towards the end and it felt stuck. She felt she couldn’t really just go for it.

Can you relate to this feeling?

I know I can.

I can remember warming up for auditions in my studio apartment in Manhattan into my pillow, worried that I would disturb my neighbors. (Even though it was the middle of the day.)

Or even when I would rent a practice room at Ripley Grier (or before that, Harlequin Studios in Midtown, anybody remember that place!!?)

I would scope out the joint to see if anyone was RIGHT next to my spot, lest anyone HEAR me working through the trouble spots. 

Yes I know, there is a lot to unpack there. 😂

❌The concern for the “other’s” experience: Am I bothering someone? 

❌The concern about judgment: What will they think!?

→But also, in there: a fear being held in the body that has grown over time.

It’s a fear that was planted, which then grew.

The fear of making big sounds.

Where did it come from?

We all learn as little children that making big noises is not ok. (And listen, I’m not blaming parents here, I’ve got a kid, there is only so much sound making we can take. 🤪 We learn this through our culture, through societal norms.)

Through a child’s eyes, especially those who are pleasers, they take note that being quiet is rewarded, big sounds can cause displeasure.

Sound familiar?

The body remembers.

(There is a lot we could go into around just being a woman and speaking up but let’s leave that for another time and stay focused on the singing part.)

Singers are asked to confront these deeply buried beliefs about themselves: you bump up against this every time you open your mouth.

Ok. So. Here is where your responsibility to yourself comes into play.

Being a singer comes with the great responsibility to hold yourself through the process of connecting to your voice with compassion and with love.

It is your job to confront this societal norm that is being stored in your body and work to release that.

How do you do this?

You do this is by advocating for yourself.

By tuning in to the quieter voice.

By aligning with your inner knowing. 

Who is going to show up with you in the practice room as you work through this belief being held in your body that making sound is “bad”?

Will it be the judgmental voice saying, “you are too loud”?

Will it be the pleaser voice saying, “you are disturbing others.”

Will it be the perfectionist voice saying, “you are not good enough yet”?

Sort through the negative thoughts that arise, try to not get attached to them and bring empathy, love, compassion, curiosity and kindness as you engage with this vulnerable act.

By holding yourself through this process with compassion, by showing up for YOU, by advocating for that little person within, you can begin to experience freedom. 

Freedom in your sound making.

Freedom within yourself.

Now go make some sound. ☺️