My take on people pleasers. 😇

10 1/2 years ago I moved out of NYC to upstate NY, to a brand new area, with a brand new community.

I didn’t know anyone.

We had a young child, we were looking for a different kind of experience. Being closer to nature and away from the hustle bustle was what we were seeking.

It was an adventure.

When we got here I would go to the playground and awkwardly stand with other moms, striking up conversations, hoping to find likeminded friends.

That eventually happened.

My son was playing with a girl about his age and her mom was standing nearby.

We started talking.

She shared that she had just started up a women’s group of sorts and perhaps I would want to join?

She invited me to a practice I was not at all familiar with: Authentic Movement. (For those not familiar, it’s a movement therapy practice of sorts.)

Even though I had no idea what this was, I felt that inner nudge that I should go.

This first time I went, we sat in a circle and went around and shared.

I don’t know what I was expecting, but I hadn’t anticipated this.

I was scared out of my mind.

I didn’t know anyone here (other than the woman who invited me) and I felt thrown.

The structure was that we would go around and everyone would share uninterrupted for several minutes, WHATEVER they felt like sharing, with no response from anyone else.

🤯

What!?

How would I know if what I shared was “good” or “valid” or “smart” or “funny” if no one told me?

And how can I know what everyone wants to hear from me?

I wasn’t going to have enough time to curate the perfect response after I gathered enough intel from the participants.

As in, what I think would impress them.

As in, what would be the smart thing to say and the thing to please them.

😳

Yep. I thought that.

It feels funny to admit this now, that I thought that and experienced this kind of panic around people pleasing/impressing.

I later came across the work of Shirzad Chamine and Positive Intelligence.

I went through the program and worked on those people pleasing tendencies. I learned about these specific voices in our heads that are contributing to the ways we all self sabotage.

I loved it so much that I continued on to the coaching certification program so that I could help others identify these parts of ourselves, turn the volume down on these well meaning voices and instead align with the part of the self that has your best interest in mind- your highest success, happiness and wellbeing.

I took this work and incorporated it into the program I have been developing this past year: A Course in Joyful Singing.

I couldn’t be more excited about it.

It was just in beta testing and completed a couple of weeks ago.

What we learned is that this is a program singers need! It fills a void that many are encountering as singers.

Vocal technique is NOT enough.

The ways we self sabotage is important to address if we ever want to achieve the level of success we are desiring.

If happiness is at all a goal.

If burnout is keeping you from moving forward.

It’s all this and more.

It’s the program I wish I’d had when I was working toward my dream of performing on Broadway.

It’s the program I wish I’d had when I did make it to Broadway and was performing full time.

It’s the program I wish I’d had when I took a break from singing.

It’s the program I wish I’d had when my Dad died and I lost my voice.

It’s the program I wish I’d had when I was trying to figure out how singing fit into my life.

I’m relaunching in January and would love to have you be a part of it.

This is a go-at your-own pace course PACKED with info and resources that includes 2 monthly Live Calls with Lifetime access.

You heard me right.

I have a waiting list and if you join it (with no obligation to purchase) you will receive a special discount that no one else will PLUS early access on January 6th.

That authentic movement group became one of the best things that ever happened to me!

Proof that stepping out of your comfort zone can have an incredible impact.

Proof that following that inner nudge will NOT lead you astray.

Proof that we need others, we need community, we need likeminded friends supporting us in our journey, in our quest to find, connect and free our authentic voice.